Time to go into lockdown and isolation. Not that people would miss me much i think. Since i'm pretty much always the last option. I'm everybody's last option, last one the list of people you think of when it comes to anything.

Nothing I've done has ever changed that in any way. I guess that's good in its own way. Makes it easier for me to disappear. because nobody would really notice.

Seriously. I need to stop thinking with that perspective. It just creates more problems. Maybe its time to let it go. Its already passed the mark. I guess I'm just afraid of the day that things stop staying the way they are now.

It can't go any further. because that just makes things complicated. and i hate it when things become complicated. damn.

I have to walk away. I don't want to, but I have to. Its better for everyone that way. really. If i don't it'll get out of control.

I'm sorry.