A tale of 2 camps

you know... its funny how when faced with 2 exactly similar scenarios you can feel so different about them. and like the title suggests, its about 2 camps i'll be attending 1 week after another.

The Next Stage Retreat (23-25 Jun, 3D 2N)

this one's for church. kind of a retreat for tertiary students. i'm actually in charge of planning games for this one (unbelievable right?). and yet, somehow it just doesn't excite me. i'm just waiting to get it over and done with. which is weird cos i haven't been doing much lately anyway, so i shouldn't feel tired or anything.

PyschOne - Genesis (4-6 July, 3D 2N)

this one's for psychology. Freshmen Orientation Camp no less. and to excuse the pun, i'm more "pysched-up" for this one. don't ask me why (i think its because there's more excitement in the whole thing). so far its the trial runs which have made my life interesting, giving me stuff to look forward to in the weeks as they pass (wargames, sentosa, then fright night on friday).

the thoughts in question:

so which brings me back to the question: how can i feel so differently about camps where i have perhaps equal levels of involvement? honestly speaking, the games for TNS retreat have left me a little demoralised. just when i got everything down nicely (or at least i thought i did), along they come and tell me that it might have to be toned down some more. talk about a dampener. i think i just feel like crap about the whole thing because all i've been faced with is the "you can't do this, you shouldn't do that" approach. at times i've seriously considered just telling them i want to up and leave. but that's irresponsible and i've seen where those kind of actions end up.

on to PsychOne. i'm really fired up for that (maybe cos it means i can hang out with my friends from school). i really look forward to the trials and everything (even volunteered to help with payment collection this sat). maybe its the approach that's taken towards it - relaxed, fun and open. but that's an orientation camp for you. so much different from a retreat.

i dunno. i really don't. can't understand why i'm feeling like that (towards TNS especially). i know i should be more excited about it, more fired up.... but instead i'm just feeling... flat.