I said i would support her no matter what she chose to do, as long as she knew what she was doing, and she was happy with the outcome. So why is it that when she's made a choice, I can't just let it be?

I know i have no obligation to be overly worried for her no matter how things turn out - because its her life and not mine. So why do i worry?

I know that to her i'm nothing more than a friend, one who can (or will) be as close as her other friends. So why do i wish things were otherwise?

I believe that things will never work out in that way for us, because we're just not right for each other. So why do i hope otherwise?

I feel that we've already drifted apart a long time ago, and things will never ever be like the way they were before. So why do wish that things weren't this way?

Because....

.... She is TulipGirl.

... She means a lot to me.

.... she is someone i would've been willing to do anything for (if i could)

.... she is special.

But that was then. This is now. Wake up to the reality that is. Not the reality that was. Wake up Chris. No more dreams. Only the reality of what is and what will be - and that will be a future without her.